Simplicity , Broken down

~~Tuesday, March 31, 2009~~

Smoke Screen

So often people say they found their lover in their friend. I just have to wonder if they've found a means to fit their end. I thought I knew you for so long, but now I've come to see that this man is a stranger, and you don't remember me. For the first time in my life I wanted someone I could keep to treasure me both heart and soul, to hold me in my sleep. When I saw you I was overjoyed, my search at last concluded, who knew that I would come to find that I was just deluded? Because as we grew together something still kept us apart, I have your body and your mind, but I'll never have your heart. And I still wish that we could have that true love and forever, but reality stole my happy ending, leaving me with never. And if you asked, what would I say? Would I dare to throw it all away? Would yes be right? Or is it no? But we never ask, so on we go. And still I know that in the end, you're not my lover but my friend. This is the truth that I despise. When I suddenly realize. We're not in love.

Azmi - out!

3/31/2009 02:15:00 PM

~~Monday, March 30, 2009~~

OPERATION CODE NAME: BRAVO DELTA

I've decided. I've got this really huge plan coming up. And NO! It's no talk shop. I made this promise and im gonna make it happen. It will take alot of time. But it will be all worth it. I've got everything set and good to go. The date is marked and counting down. So here goes nothing. For the better or worse. We shall see when the day comes. Alright people, wait for my GO!

Till then. Azmi - Out!

3/30/2009 03:12:00 PM

~~Saturday, March 28, 2009~~

THE WAY OF THE BUDDHA

One has to learn to let go. In order to be happy.

For it will come again. For the better.

One has to learn to not to hate. But to forgive.

To err is human. To forgive, divine.

Azmi - Out.

3/28/2009 06:12:00 PM

~~Friday, March 27, 2009~~

Pictures don't lie

It's 4am now. I was browsing thru some photos and came across a photo which i can clearly say, pictures don't lie. Whatever happened that day i wouldn't know. I foolishly believed every single word said. I mean what's the point of lying? You've already done enough damage. Why continue doing it? I doubt you actually understand. It's very saddening. I'm lost for words now. Goodbye love.

Azmi - Out!

3/27/2009 04:12:00 AM

~~Wednesday, March 25, 2009~~

UNFAIR

There is really something wrong with this world. This is really unfair. I know nothing is fair. But this is really too much. Why is it that you can't accept my results? Is it really that bad?! Its freaking 3.2!! I know its not a perfect score but still. FUCK! You really don't know what is fucking means to me.

Why is it that people of lower score can get in and i don't? I've done whatever necessary to get into the school. I've complete what most guys hate. And i foolishly applied for 3 times in a row. Thinking that i stand a better chance that i've done the 2 bloody years. FUCK! FUCK ANND NOTHING ELSE BUT FUCK! This is pure nonsense. Nothing but bullshit!

Azmi fucking out! God Damn you!

3/25/2009 11:35:00 AM

~~Monday, March 23, 2009~~

ABSENT MINDED

I fail to see what is around me. Failing to see what is actually worth it. The time and effort. All has gone to waste. Nothing has been appreciated.
I was just to caught up with it. People around me realise it.
Advice after advice. I failed to understand.

But not anymore. This time round, the picture seems so much clearer. After clearing my doubts with a few people. I'm finally set to take up the task and carry on with it. I've been travelling on this road too long. And finally i found my way back home. The old me is dead and gone. And no. I did not change.

Till then,

Azmi - Out!

3/23/2009 10:45:00 PM

~~Friday, March 20, 2009~~

THE GREAT ESCAPE

Hello peeps. Im back from Pahang. And let me tell you, the trip was a blast. From the participants to the facilitators and not forgetting the non-stop adventurous actitvites. Your heart pumps faster and harder at every corner of the 4WD ride. The race up the mountains was the ultimate ride ever. Not knowing wad to expect at the next turn or wad's the obstacle up ahead of you. Everything was just fabulous. And guess wad? i dont think you would believe me. We ate durians that cost it cost us a bomb!! Haha. Well, its not thos ordinary durians. IT'S FREAKING D24. So you can imagine how costly it is. How much, its RM$2660. Yeah! That was how expensive it was.

Well on a lighter note. The trip served it's purpose for me. Away from the main land and all the hustle and bustle back home. Well frankly for the first time in my life. I felt a lil emotional when i left home on tues morning. Saying a gd bye to my mum was like me, being sent to iraq and not knowing whether im coming back home. Yeah that was i went thru. Its this feel that makes you wanna come back home and see them.

As the sunset and putting a closure to my day. I still manage to find a lil peace and quite time for myself. Sitting on the bench just outside of the house with my little note book on hand, filling up the empty pages with my reflections and relinquishing myself of this distraught mind of mine. I've set new meaning and motivations to my life. Putting my past experience to good use. Feeding myself with the most motivational and positive thoughts. I will be better and stronger in every aspect of my life. I've set the record straight and will take control of my life now. Nothing is gonna stop me now.

I am the master of my life. And the master of my enemy. I will. Before i god i swear this. I will fire myself through, for i am the savior of my life. I will fight till there is no more enemy. But peace. Amin. Till then. The only easy day was yesterday. Hooyah!

My quote of the day.

In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in an clearer light, and what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself into crystal clearness. Our life is a long and arduous quest after Truth. - Mahatma Gandhi

Azmi - Out!

3/20/2009 03:57:00 PM

~~Thursday, March 12, 2009~~

HELLO WORLD!! I woke up to this very beautiful morning looking at straight at my ceiling and said today will be a great day for me and i will not let anyone or anything to come in my way. Haha. I just feel great la. I dunno why either. But oh well. Im at amk mac now. Just waiting for work to start. Haha and thanks to this wonderful phone of joyce's i wont be bored. Haha. If i can find a hotspot that is haha. So till then you guys have a great day. Cheerios! Azmi - Out!

3/12/2009 12:03:00 PM

~~Wednesday, March 11, 2009~~

I was just browsing thru some of my old photos. I really missed all those time i spent you guys. Well here are just some of the many photos. Enjoy =)

ITE DAYS

Rocky!

Presenting the Yut.

AND ME

My 20th b'day with the 50th.

Me the trying to act sissy.

XL, Grace and Me

CY and Me

Look at YB. GIRL POWER

The tummy of "Wealth" haha

Ah Fu and Me.

The Surprise Dinner for ME!

The crazy ride!

YES THE FREAK SHOW.

Yeah i know wad's going thru your head.
But hey i miss those times alrite.

Yes. You guessed it. ZOUKOUT '08

Zirca.

Yayaya. Another one miss.

3/11/2009 10:38:00 PM

I had this really weird dream last night. I was in the middle of a war. During the WWII. The invasion of Normandy or otherwise known as "D-Day". Don't ask me how it got into my dreams. I was fighting along the side the British and France forces. The dream was so real that i could feel the impact of the artillery fire power. And the sound of bullets passing thru my ears. Its crazy i tell you. You hear people shouting out for medics, screaming in pain. Even now, as i'm telling you this i hear people shouting ''GRENADE!!!" It was a hell of a dream. I've never imagined myself being a war. Even so i wanna try what it is like. People call me a war junkie eventhough i wasn't in the miltary. I've always wanted to try being in there. Understanding what it is like. Have a taste of it on my own. Some guys are just so afraid of serving in the miltary. Doing AWOL and all. But seriously. Its the country that you lived in and you wanna protect it at all cost. Well, i hope to live that dream of mine someday. But now, its back to reality. I gotta get my myself a proper qualifications if i wanna be in there. So till my next weird dream. Till then, Azmi - Out!

3/11/2009 05:26:00 PM

~~Monday, March 09, 2009~~

I don't know how to make lots of money.

I got debts that I'm trying to pay.

I can't buy you nice things, like big diamond rings.

But that don't mean much anyway.

I can't give you the house you've been dreaming.

If I could I would build it alone I'd be out there all day, just hammering away.

Make us a place of our own.

I don't know that I'd make a good soldier.

I don't believe in being violent and cruel I don't know how to fight, but I'll draw blood tonight.

If somebody tries hurting you.

I don't know how to make lots of money.

I don't know all the right things to do.

I can't say where we'll go, but the one thing I know.

Is how to be a good man to you.

Until I die that's what I'll do.

I will write you a song.

That's how you'll know that my love is still strong.

I will write you a song and you'll know from this song that I just can't go on without you

3/09/2009 04:30:00 PM

~~Sunday, March 08, 2009~~

Is it so hard so keep others updated? Like where, wad, and so on so forth. But i guess it is for some. Not really sure why. You know sometimes you'll just be hanging ard doing nth, starring blankly into space wandering, waiting for smth to happen or to see whether will you see in appearing somewhere in your mobile. But nope. Whenever it rings. It isn't wad you expect. Never the one you wanted to see. Worse still, smth else happened. Have you felt like that before? Yeah i'm sure you had. It's pretty shitty yeah. And i realise its of no use. Why wait? Since they couldn't be bothered. Why should i. They're out there enjoying their activities enjoying their time. I lost it. And will never regain that back. Oh well. I'll see you in hell.

Azmi - Out!

3/08/2009 01:06:00 PM

"It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by the dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions and spends himself in a worthy course; who at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who, at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly; so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory or defeat." THEODORE ROOSEVELT (Paris Sorbonne,1910)

3/08/2009 01:29:00 AM

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